Christmas on the Phone

Apparently, I wasn't the only one spending Christmas alone. 

I reconnected with a couple of friends last night via good old cell phone. It was nice to catch up with everyone and see how they were doing. I updated them a little on myself and they updated a little about themselves.

I spoke with Eric (real names here!). He was telling me about his marriage plans, which were basically non-existent yet since the wedding date isn't until 2015. He has so much time to plan, I think he can afford to slack off a bit right now. But they already decided on a venue. Well, more like Stephanie decided on a venue and Eric just went along with the idea. Eric seems more set on the date, and Stephanie is more set on the venue, but the venue is not available on that date. So it's kinda up in the air right now. It's either going to be on a Sunday at Stephanie's choice venue or at a random location on Saturday, Eric's preferred day. I guess Eric is just thinking of everyone's travel plans, since Sunday would be difficult for people working, LIKE ME, to get there and get back to their homes in a timely manner and still be able to make it to work on Monday. So we'll see what happens, but I think we'll all know what happens. The "W" in wedding really stands for "woman". The woman decides everything. Everyone knows that! Eric's choice is likely to be vetoed and overruled haha. 

He also told me that he actually wanted to do a destination wedding, like in Hawaii or something. That SOUNDED AMAZING!!! Well, it would have been amazing, if Stephanie didn't already X out that idea. Most of Eric's side, family and friends, will be coming from somewhere else, so it doesn't matter really if they fly in to SJ or another location, they are still going to have to pay for airfare and hotel. But I guess most of Stephanie's side of the family is local, so they would prefer to stay local. Which makes sense, but also sucks. Because a destination wedding would have been SO MUCH FUN! Wedding and a vacation, all in one! Yes! Way to maximize the phrase: kill two birds with one stone! But it's not going to happen, because as I said, refer to the "w" for wedding and woman. 

So I guess Eric has been sick. He's not spending Christmas with any friends or family, or Stephanie! He wanted to spend it alone, recuperating from his nasty cold. He's been working himself to death lately, problems at work always gets the best of us. So apparently, I wasn't the only one spending Christmas alone. 

Almost right after I hung up with Eric, I was gchatted by Zach. Yes, my BF's friend. Now come to think of it, Eric was also his friend too, and then he became closer to me. Is Zach also migrating towards that zone? I ended up chatting with Zach for around 2 hours. What did we talk about? I don't know! We barely even have anything in common! It still baffles me how we spent so many hours chatting about nothing. But I guess that happens when you put two chatty people together. So I guess if you wanted details, he did go in depth about his dating life and I talked about mine.

When he talked about my BF and I, I was really not expecting to hear what he had to say. Of course, whether they really mean it or not, people will kindly or courteously say, "You guys are so cute together! I knew you guys would end up together! You guys are perfect together" But I didn't get any of that from Zach. One of the first things Zach said was "I was so happy when I found out you guys were moving FAR away from each other. I was thinking, 'that's great! there's no way they could rekindle their relationship, they are so far apart!' but then somehow you guys managed to get back together! Why?!?! You guys have NOTHING in common! And you guys have tried to date each other so many times, how is this time different?" He's kinda right. We don't really have that much in common and we have tried to date each other many times, what makes this time so different than all the other failed attempts? And then he continued "I think you guys probably just liked each other because you guys lived together and were around each other all the time. It's just a matter of convenience, if you pretend you didn't know him and met him right now, went on a date with him, would you like him?? NO! You wouldn't!" He's also right. Wow, so much insight from this bystander. I argued with him for while about these observations he had about me and my BF. I gave examples like "we both like to be exercise and go outdoors" and he retaliated with "but he likes to bike and you don't like to bike, you run and hike. He doesn't like either of those things" Touche. "Think about it, you like to eat and he doesn't. He's super serious about life and you aren't. He's all responsible and clean. You are irresponsible and messy, what do you possibly have in common?" He's got a point. I couldn't think of anything. Why couldn't I think of anything? We must have SOMETHING in common. There must be something that binds us together. Why couldn't I argue back?? 

Zach also criticized how my BF never takes any time off to spend with me. He painful pointed out again how I have taken time off of my new job, even though I've only been working for a few months, to go spend days-week at his place, but when I go up there, he doesn't take any time off to spend with me. I didn't realize how wrong that was until many people brought it up to my attention. And then after that was brought to my attention, I realized it hurts a little every time people bring it up. It's almost embarrassing. It's like if you were left at the alter embarrassing. Ok, maybe not to that extreme but it's like, I made the effort and Ishowed up and he didn't. He's didn't make the effort for me. He just left me hanging at his place, waiting for him to return from work. Which including travel time, he would be gone for >12hrs a day. But when I asked Zach if he's taken any time off, Zach surprisingly said that he hadn't taken any time off this year. Just when I was about to give Zach a hard time for being a hypocrite, he fights back  first, "I would take time off, but I have no one to take time off for!! What am I going to do? Take time off to travel by myself? NO! If I were your BF, the right thing to do would be to take time off to spend with you when you've traveled so far and taken time off your work to be with him! That's the least he can do! And if he's really awesome, he'd take some time off to travel somewhere else with you to spend more time with you!" Darn Zach, he's hit me where it hurts again. I kicked and I'm down. Can't fight back. 

I took what he said to heart. So that night I texted, not call, but texted my BF and told him about all these insights that Zach brought up. In the past, when I would bring up problems with our relationship, it would inevitably lead to a break up. Which was what I was anticipating would happen last night. But this time was different. My BF started listed things we had in common to show me that we weren't completely different people. "Wildwood" and "Kurtis". A child's book that we both read and a medium sized 10" stuffed animal...I don't know if that's suppose to be sweet in a childish way or pathetic, but at least he tried to show that we have things in common. Now, I don't exactly remember how the rest of the conversation went, because you know how texting can be hard. You text one thing and the other person texts about another and then you answer their text and they answer yours and before you know, you are talking about 4 things at once and it's hard to keep track of who responded to what and what text response is meant for what topic of conversation. But the bottom line is that he said "let's talk about it this weekend". Ok, so we are going to talk about it this weekend. I'll let you know how that goes. 

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There really aren't plans for my BF and I to see each other past January. So we were trying to plan for the next time. We thought President's Day would be a good time. So I bought my tickets and everything. Then he calls me a week later and tells me that his parents are going up to visit him that weekend so we'll have to cancel. I have to say I'm kinda disappointed. That weekend was going to big for us. It was going to be our 8th month anniversary and it's Valentine's Day. *sighs Oh well. I cancelled my tickets (good thing it's southwest). So my BF told me to plan for the next three day weekend. But then I realized the next three day weekend would be at the end of May. So does that mean that we won't see each other Feb, March, April and the entire month of May (because the three day weekend isn't until the last week of May). "let's talk about it this weekend". Ok. I better start a list because there seems to be a lot of things we need to discuss this weekend. 

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So I mentioned how there's a new doctor that works here at the clinic. He's a very nice guy. It always amazes me how nice and caring and generous he is. He's really truly amazing. Every time we go to dinner, he always pays for me. ALWAYS. Who does that? And when I try to pay, he gets upset and makes me hand him over the bill. I went to buy chips for the potluck we had at work and he paid for all the chips! So I got the credit and he paid for it. I wanted to tell everyone that he paid for the chips but he told me not to. I was invited over to a co-worker's house for dinner and he bought a cake and told me to pretend it was from me. I carried it inside, I didn't tell anyone it was from me, but I was forbidden to tell anyone it was form him, so I'm pretty sure I got all the credit. He got me a nice card and a gift card for Christmas. I didn't know we were exchanging gifts. Fail. The only thing I got him was a tin of hot chocolate. No card. Fail. I really want to thank him for all his meals and his nice gifts and his kind gestures but he wouldn't accept anything from me! I am really hoping that this weekend when my BF comes, the both of us will be able to convince him to let us take him out for dinner. I really hope he will let me pay. It's getting so ridiculous. I owe him so much! Too much. Which again, makes me wonder, why did all these terrible things happen to such good people?? His GF died from lymphoma, his mother died from a stroke, his father died shortly after from a heart break (or a heart attack). So many bad things happened to him in such a short amount of time. 

Then there's you. You're so nice. You don't deserve half the things that you are going through right now. It's so unfair. You volunteer for God's sake! Like I said, I never even think about volunteering! I'm a selfish, non-volunteering, non-giving back person. Not that I wish bad things on myself, but I feel like if there was a hierarchy of bad things to happen to people, I should be on the list first. Or at least those people that murder other people or do bad things to other intentionally. You and the new doctor should be the LAST people on the list or not even on the list at all! Life is so unfair sometimes. I'm so sorry. 

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I know it's pathetic but it's 8 oclock. I'm tired and you are rushing me to post. So I must sleep now. My eyes are droopy and almost closed. Good night.

Oh! I'm glad you got the present! Finally! :) 

Did you get the other package yet??